Pablo, Miguel's Mate: Psst, Miguel!
Miguel: December the...*looks up* Si??
Pablo: How long have you been writing that sodding calendar?
Miguel: Well I took over from my Dad when he died so I started at March 3rd 1958 I think...I try and do a year or so every day...
Pablo: Riiighhhtt... well, I've finished at the Pyramid for the day, was wondering if you fancied a pint?
Miguel: Nahhh, better get on mate, I've still got another few thousand years to go...
Pablo: Maria will be there....
Miguel: ...TwentiethTwoThousandandTwelve,DecembertheTwentyFirstTwoThousandandTwelve. *throws chisel and rock down*. Done. I'll pick it up again tomorrow.
- That night -
Maria: So tell me about yourself then Miguel...
Miguel: *By now rather drunk, courtesy of Pablo* Well, I'm the guy who knows for definite when the world will end...
Maria: Oh my Mayan God! Really? When?
Miguel: *Inhales sharply* well...I'll be honest with you Maria, we really don't have very long.
Maria: Oh no! How long do we have left!?
Miguel: Just tonight baby...
Maria: Arggh and I haven't had time to do anything I wanted to do...!
Miguel: Then let's make this night count...
*Picks her up and carries her away to his
- The morning after -
Miguel: *Awakening early with a terrible headache feels something stir behind him. He turns over to find Maria, naked, next to him in bed. Realising what he has done, and remembering the monstrous lie he told her to get her there, he scrambles back into his err, loin cloth?, grass skirt? and dashes out of the ...cave. Never to be seen again.*
- December 2012 AD-
Professer at the University of Stoicism: But, but...this is not possible...according to the Mayan Calendar, the world is due to end on the 21st! It just stops there - no more dates... What could this mean??
Professor at the University of Uncertainty: Well, I'm not entirely sure...
Professor at the University of Bullsh*t: Well clearly the Mayan's knew something we didn't. You can clearly tell from their calculations that they had predicted the end of the world as December 21st 2012. In fact, the Mayans were very advanced in their ability to forsee the future...
Professor at the University of Melodrama: Oh. My. God. Our days are literally numbered.
Editor of the Sun Newspaper:
S'funny, I know I was only 2 in 1958, but I really don't remember chisel and rock being the writing medium of choice in those post war years....JLS xx
ReplyDeleteClearly, someone spent a lot of time actually reading before they commented ¬,¬ lol, smooth man...
ReplyDeleteLOL *facepalm*
ReplyDelete